Posted by: Rose's Daughter | July 15, 2010

Sleep Chronicles and Hubby Issues


Last night was bad. 

I put him down.  I patted him. Kissed him.  Left the room.

He cried.

I came back in five minutes.

He got worse.

He escalated, and never calmed down for 35 minutes.


C-Dub was content to just let him cry.  He kept saying, “He’ll wear himself out.”


I couldn’t take it anymore.  I went and got him.

He had scooted himself up into a corner of the crib, was red-faced, and looked sooooo pitiful.

I picked him up and he cried and cried and cried for about 15 more minutes.  I cried the whole time he cried. 

Finally, he calmed down, C-Dub came in and we all sat there for a while making him smile and calming him down.  But the whole time, I felt like C-Dub was accusing me for not holding out.  He kept making little comments. 

“Now he’s awake and thinks its playtime.”


So anyway, finally, I rocked him back to sleep, and then put him down knocked out.

He slept from 930 till 1 am. 

At 1, I put him down drowsy, and sat beside the bed  where he could see me while he drifted off again.  I even held his hand for a little while. Then I left the room

And then he slept until 5 30 am.

So,even though he woke up early as all get out, he slept better once the crisis was over.

it was like old times!

But back to C-Dub.

I don’t know what his problem is lately.  It’s like he expects me to cook, clean, take care of his baby, and give him sex.   Basically, his maid, his babysitter, his cook, and his prostitute. With no complaints. 

That aint happening over here.

Sex?  I am ashamed(well, not really) to admit that he gets it much much much less than he did before we had the baby.  But I’m tired.  He thinks that since I only work two days a week, I should be up and popping.  But I work 12 hours nights.  Without Pookah, it used to take me a day to recover from working nights.  With him? It’s almost impossible.  I am chronically sleep deprived.  I come home from working all night, and I do not get to sleep.  Sometimes I don’t get more than 4 hours at a time for 48 hours.  He doesn’t understand this.  All he sees is “two nights a week.”  And if I ask him to watch his child for a few hours while I catch a nap, in peace, I get attitude or either he will bring the baby in the bed with us and go to sleep himself.

Again, WTF???

He doesn’t understand that I need a break.  He doesn’t understand how hard it is to cook dinner and clean a house with an active 7 month old who is screaming, teething  and demanding your attention.  He has no clue how my day goes.  How my life revolves around naps.  How I LIVE for naps. 

Of course, it’s ME who wants the daycare.  He finally agreed only because finally I told him he didn’t have a choice.  If he wanted his wife back, this is what had to happen.

But still.  He is being a butthole.  That’s putting it nicely.

And I don’t know what to do about it.  Yet.



  1. giiirrlll, if you’re not speaking my language right now! He wants to be a butthole….let him be a butthole. A lonely, sexless butthole. When he decides he’s ready to get himself some sense, then he can get himself some nookie, lmbo. works every time!
    When Byron has been working a lot, or dealing with a difficult client, he tends to get cranky, and I let him be cranky, but I make sure he understands that im not going to reward “bad” behavior.
    I was just thinking today about doing a post on “sex life after baby” I dont think they get that on top of ALREADY not having a sex-drive as big as theirs, we are tired, and overwhelmed, and underthanked, and all of that. They don’t get that sometimes we just dont freakin feel like it, lol. With that being said, (sorry if this is TMI) 3 days a week, if im not sick or something(and he’s not acting crazy) I do it. I decide which 3 days, and I amp myself up the whole day, so that even if Im a little tired, or stressed, i’ve made that commitment to spend that time with him, so I do it. It seems to make a big difference in our relationship, plus I don’t have any issues getting him to do things as I ask, lmbo.
    Oh, and he teases me about Izzy too. A few nights ago, she had a major freak out, and he kept saying that same “She’ll wear herself out” mess. Um….have you ever met this child? Once she freaks out, she has to be calmed, or sleep isnt going to happen for anybody. Well…except him, because he could sleep through a nuclear blast. But eh.
    I said ALLL of that to say, me and you? we are >here<

  2. Hang in there mama! Motherhood is the hardest job imaginable. I never knew it was this crazy til my munchkin came along. Sounds like daycare is the best option. And have ur hubby watch the baby for 8 hrs so he gets it. He’ll probably refuse but make it like a bet. Like if he can watch baby for a day without losing his mind, he gets nookie for a week – BUT we all know that he’ll fall apart so you’ll get your point across AND a week of no sex talk lol.

  3. Imma tell you my sister went through this with her Hub: being sleep deprived, cleaning , cooking and the sex giver. She finally told him one day that she was going out for the day and went to a hotel by herself to get a mini spa treatment and a much need loooong nap. She was gone for 6 hrs. After that he was more helpful with the baby and around the house.

    C-Dub needs a wake up call, being a parent isn’t easy and it shouldn’t be all on you to do. I say book a room …get a nap…Pookah will be just fine with his dad.

  4. I say it all the time, BOYS ARE STUPID!! I agree with GG, you’re going to have to start doing stuff for you.
    *Big Giant Hug*

  5. I am amazed at what hubbies are willing to put up with if sex is involved. Absolutely find some time for you. Day care will be a wonderful thing fir you. I also suggest finding someone to clean your house. It saved our marriage!

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